so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
I'm good, just tired from chardonnay and giving hand jobs.
a kid in a transformers shirt tried to pick me up last night at work. he also rolled up on a bicycle, the kind with pedals. do i look that easy?
Her vagina smelled like pancake batter. That's all you need to know.
I'm going to crush up my last 7 Percocets into a fine powder and toss my popcorn in it.
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
Breakfast of champions
Is that a dick crepe?
It is indeed
It started out as friends with benefits and now I'm picking up her kids from daycare...what has happened to me
I woke up with Pop Rocks stuck to my ass
YOU DONT EAT A GIRL OUT AND THEN GO PUKE ASSHOLE
You know it's really hard to draft fantasy football players in a crowded bar when I have a raging hard on
Only you would consider your best friend fucking your boyfriend to be a sign of everlasting friendship
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
I came so hard my ears popped.
I’m making a jello mold of my penis
Will it be as disappointing as your actual penis?
Randomize
