I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
You were wearing a sombrero. And a crown. And told me to use the nerf gun to protect your room from the cat. You don't have a cat.
She laid down on my bed and played "I want you to want me" on my laptop. subtle.
woke up to an unread text message i sent to myself: "brreakfdast..pork and ice cream."
only 75% of american men are circumcised...i guess this was bound to happen to me someday.
only clue right now is the orange grease all on my clothes. debit card denied so I know something weird went down..
Tell me you didn't have sex with my dad.
I can only send "I want your dick" texts to so many guys before I accidentally over-book myself. I need a day planner.
His dick is so big it could be an arm rest.
I just tried to pay for a coffee with a dollar and a necco wafer.
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
I just want to nap and funnel a bottle of wine in a cute dress
Apparently mid making out I got up and said "I need to figure out my life" went in the bathroom and threw up for two hours.
Also barcrawl friday. You ARE wearing a tiara
I really regret not asking “like a cupcake” when you asked me to eat your ass
Randomize