i have i love cock written on my hand and a vagina drawn on my arm and i just finished eating breakfast with the whole fam for mothers day
ahah at least you got away with it
nope...my gran was the one who informed me
I've had that scene from "Parenthood" where Rick Moranis' character is singing "Close To You" to his wife in classroom, stuck in my head all morning.
I guess my mind is just wondering whatever happened to Rick Mornais.
I just threw up, I'm either bulemic or pregnant, and I'm now accepting bets on which it is
so how much must it suck for him to know that the penis of his best man has been in his wife's mouth before?
When he was fingering me, it felt/looked like he was digging around for pocket change.
Going to pass out with da shoes on. hugging wallstreet journal from tuesday. please check me for liveliness in the morning.
this is hardly the first time i've been told i'm dressed "too suggestively" for 7 in the morning.
Everyone makes mistakes, yours just means you will forever be known as the chick that tried to steal a cheese plate from the funeral.
I'll pull you in a wagon. You'll have a sash and a crown on and we'll sing "All the Single Ladies"
Mom said you looked used
when the song champagne showers came on you poured some kids beer over his head... while giving him a lap dance
Just beer bonged tequila, broke into the hotel next door and got chased by security. It's spring break
Nah, i wasn't offended. Having a bridesmaid who you had had multiple threesomes with your future husband would be weird.
I was legit late to work one day Bc it took me so long to get a good nude
Please tell me you haven’t left campus yet!!!! I forgot my Hitachi and will not survive Thanksgiving without a steady supply of orgasms
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