I think she would actually eat a penis if anyone was brave enough to let one near her mouth
I have on cowboy boots and a ten gallon hat. I'd say I'm a little past tipsy
Just turned elections for the sorority into a drinking game. Right on.
I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
On a positive note, new entry in my phone as 'HOT ASS, DOWN TO FUCK'. idk if its a boy or girl tho.
Update, its a couple
i knew you were okay when you wanted to eat in the ambulance
We've started doing pot butter shots. WHY AREN'T U HERE
I am as serious as getting herpes in Mexico...
What do herpes have to do with anything?
I blacked out after running into my soc TA in the beer garden. came to dancing on the speakers at major lazer and making out with said TA.
I peed in a 7/11 last night. Like literally pretended I pretended I was shopping, looked around, and peed on boxes in the corner. No more tequila
We had hangover sex and then I called a taxi home. Told him I didn't want his number because, if it was meant to be, we would fuck again. He called me the queen of one night stands.
Aaand now my client contact has seen your boobs.
i woke up at 4 pm face down on my hardwood living room floor. i would say its a new low but i think I found my new napping spot
Oh my fucking god, I was conceived on the first date.
it's the international house of making me almost fucking shit myself
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