fuck, i think i'm broken. Alchyhol air mattress = the suck.
I think she would actually eat a penis if anyone was brave enough to let one near her mouth
Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
I woke up, not remembering how or when or why i was even there and looked over to find Steph spooning with an adult black man.
This is my last and worst hangover of the decade...I almost cherrish it
I couldn't even finish, she was lounder and more annoying than DJ Khaled
Cumming on a girls face is guy code for you're not wife material.
Apparently I joined a band last night. Definitely my favorite blackout.
girl I've been sleeping with this summer as per her request just gave me a carton of cigs to thank me for my "hospitality". this is good.
Yeah? Well I'm currently predrinking downstairs in my room by myself. Absolut and water with a hint of mint because I'm using the glass I keep my toothbrush in. Fuck, you bitches better get off work soon.
Lube is flammable
Who is this??
It's almost like sex was the ice breaker and now we're sociable at the gym
I'm to the point where I just want to get back at him in a hot man sex tornado way.
wow wtf man i was the friend bailing you out of jail with 500 cash and you didnt have the common courtesy of waking me up for class when i passed out drunk and naked in the bath tub
I’m making a jello mold of my penis
Will it be as disappointing as your actual penis?
Randomize
