I dont know whether to be proud of myself for not driving, or being proud that i was so messed up I couldnt drive
I just woke up. In the port-o-potty next to our tailgate. an hour after the game started. explain.
i just learned how to squirt via google. life is good.
CNN just did a special on how to do heroin safely.. I recorded it for us
so its thursday, which means its time to resume communication with you
Had a drag queen carry me to the car. So I'm told...
I can't believe I've come to a point in my life where sex for a birthday present is acceptable
Obviously he considers you not fucking him as fucking up. Thus making him fuck up. Based on this I believe he should be disqualified from the race to your vagina.
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
Also I owe you 20 bucks, a clean towel and a glass of scotch. I'll even throw in a blow job
My doctor was like "I think adderall is a great choice. It'll definitely benefit you and you say you've taken it before so you'll be fine!" \nAnd I was like "yeah bro, totally"
My day so far: morning after pill and pancakes. Living the dream.
Too much dab too little lung dying šµšµšµ
after we got done having sex, you rolled over and ask what your yelp review was. So yea I'm kinda mad.
found my cat trying to steal a lighter to hide away for himself. cat what are you doing. don't pocket my lighter.
Randomize
