I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
I just found out I have a small penis.
Couldn't you tell by how you've NEVER had a girlfriend?
walk of shame with early morning football tailgaters. niice.
composition of my stomach right now: 60% C8H10N4O2 * H2O (coffee), 20% CaCO3 (pepto bismol/tums), 10% HCl (stomach acid), 5% fried rice, 5% residual adderall. i can do that by percent mass too. fuck you finals.
No. My vagina is not the scapegoat for your poor decisions.
I flashed a party boat full of Asians yesterday, didn't I?
I'm gonna do some tripping... In the direction of balls
I walked into your room and you had fallen asleep smoking a cigarette. You just had the butt in your mouth with ash all over your face.
No he can't help me find his house he is strapped to a stretcher facing the opposite direction
Oh and I'm kind of in the library.
Waiting for the foreign guy who keeps staring to make his creepy move.
it's ok my mom asked me why i had a guys shirt on and also why there was chocolate all over my bra
Do you always skip to "Baby Got Back" when fat girls show up at the bar?
Oh it's tea and biscuits for everyone. An possibly pink eye
she crossed my comfort zone...i thought i was a freak
said the guy with a pink sex swing...
Brother gave me a harry potter philosophy book for xmas we need to get stoned and talk about this.
Randomize
