I didn't say she couldn't, I said you shouldn't.
yea i came on her face and told her to bring a snorkel next time
can't remember last night but the beers were $3.50, so i can count how many I had by counting my quarters
i can afford to take several trips up and down the parkway right now if I wasn't still hanging over my toilet
sometimes you just have to pull up your panties, blow a kiss to the security camera and walk out of the alley like nothing happened.
like he couldn't stop by and throw me in the back seat and ask for a blowjob? he had to give me flowers?
took adderall before wrapping presents, ended up making paper snowflakes for two hours
i feel like i got punched in the cervix. he's a little different in bed than i thought he would be..
adding to the list of how to lure in freshman boys: take dogs for a walk, yell at them from across the street, sit on the curb at 3 in the morning sobbing
She's just done the monthly not prego dance around our kitchen
He's getting me an energy drink and said good morning beautiful. He must sense i'm cutting him off from the sex.
There's an owl outside. I feel like he's hooing directly at me.
he accidentally put it in my ass, i liked it but didn't tell him that and "accidentally" took his weed.
Tomorrow night, I am putting you In my trunk. No excuses we have waited forever for this.
i'm in a very strange mood rn i'm listening to bruno mars??? am i ok????
It's a Saturday night and I am in bed with two cats, a bottle of Riesling, and I'm masturbating to Iron Man. I'm great at being 21.
Randomize
