i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
He asked about stds. I told him I don't have any... which I don't. They are now called sti's. Whooopsie
Apparently, I woke up in the middle of the night, got up out of bed, dropped trou in the corner, squatted, and pissed on the carpet. When Eric heard, he thought it was the dog and started yelling, and I responded by saying "No no, its okay. It's me."
dude stop sending me pictures of your dick in weird places. i get it. you rock out with your cock out.
Just saw the first guy I gave head to lose in the french open...some how I feel better that my mistake made it to the same mistake as our relationship, the third round. Don't judge.
apparently dick flashing is a frowned upon sport here..... sorry girlfriends mom
It was a group decision to take your pants off. Took a solid 10 minutes. No more skinny jeans while drinking.
Purse pizza: the pizza you buy before the club, and you eat on the train home. I thought you knew me by now!
Just managed to stab myself in the ass with a fork. I feel that as my best friend, I'm obligated by friend code to inform you of that sort of thing.
He said "you speak American pretty good for a Canadian" and it took everything in me to still fuck him. Dry spell ended btw
Definitely broke my toe and messed up my knee walking back. Drink hitch hiking should never happen again.
I am about five seconds from ripping off my clothes and throwing myself into the ocean to become a mermaid
So is he the one who got away?
They all got away. I’m a catch and release kind of girl.
My life is a random series of events connected only by bottles of Seagram's 7
the weird part wasn't waking up in someone else's underwear, it was how the cat was staring at me like he knew more about last night then i remembered.
Randomize
