sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
They were lying down in the parking garage pretending to be speed bumps...
Maybe if i steal enough bar glasses i can justify all the money spent i've spent there
We were fucking on his hammock and right as he came we flipped over. I landed on him, he landed on a pile of pinecones. We're done with nature sex.
Me and my vagina aren't speaking at the moment.
Sometimes familiar penis is best. Its like comfort food for your vagina.
You were carrying around a milk crate, randomly putting it down calling out 'praise be to the milk gods' and making people pray to it.
When someone comes out of your vagina and stomps on your dreams, you'll understand.
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
And regarding bottomless mimosas stopping at 1 pm, there was a chick who drove her car into the back of the bar. Blame that bitch, not you peeing in the koi pond.
I'm not sure what exactly you were planning, but you kept yelling that we were going to need a lot of midgets and a lawyer.
I feel like captain Morgan put his peg leg up my ass
I just don't understand why we can't have sex in the house. I'll come see you but I'll have to think about the barn thing.
Just used the word fistfucking in a serious conversation with my professor in front of the class, while making an appropriate and valid point. Win.
I love that they love me even though I might not exsist, its kinda like Im God.
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