Just had to open a tuna can with a spoon. Gave me a sense of hunting for my own food.
Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
At least you didnt end up topless in a Tina Turner wig singing cabaret tunes
did i have both of my shoes on when the bouncer threw us out last night?
Just a heads up. Everytime I get arrested in Maine I claim I lost my ID and use your name.
I'm drinking with 3 chicks and 1 gay dude. 100% chance I'm getting laid and 75% chance I'll enjoy it.
Did I tell you I had a charge show up for $36 on a credit card I haven't used in 6 months from Wild Wings? It was that night we slept across the street from the bar.
the mechanics of walkigng feel weird right now everyone lools like a demon
what does alcohol mean
She thinks I should try and corrupt him and take his virginity. While I do love virgins, I'm a little too lazy to put in the corruption effort right now. That's a summer kinda job.
I don't trust a bar IN TENNESSEE that doesn't have Jack Daniels.
What happened?
New Orleans
Every time
sometimes you just have to listen to beyonce and cry. that's how life works
I was simply suggesting that you really should try coke bondage sex.
Best single mom victory - getting eaten out in my dodge caravan in the hospital parkade at midnight.Three words: screaming multiple orgasms.
Forget Covid themed costumes. I need one that attracts a quality penis
preferably one with a six figure job and a boat
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