Condoms? Check. Glitter? Check. Fuck me pumps? Double check. Dignity? No where to be found. I'm about to homewreck the shit out of that dumb bitch.
I've been meaning to talk to you about your lack of self-respect these days and the toll it's taking on your vagina.
she said "feliz nobby job" then proceeded to give me a blowjob.
The bartender let me pay my bar tab with my itunes giftcards.
She bent the beer can with her tongue. I'm scared of what she'll do to me
Alive...but barely. Had dinner with my parents tonight which was conveniently located near where i left my car, phone, and self respect
I just want uncharted vagina. Fresh and ripe.
sorry for allegedly lighting the beer pong balls of fire
You crawled through a doggy door 5 times for a shot if cheap vodka.
Well who could blame her. I would run away from me if I could.
I DO NOT KNOW WHO SHE IS, WE HAVE NO MORE FRUIT, SHE CAN'T STAY HERE.
The entire state will know me by my boobs.
I think I'd be more bothered by his cross dressing if I wasn't secretly into women..,
I HAVE PIZZA MONEY AT ALL TIMES IT'S CALL EMERGENCY PLANNING
I have one goal now that I am in the USA. To find a man I can fuck into marriage before my visa runs out.
I think the hamburger goblin stole my cigarettes. I left my purse behind her table and they're not in it now.
Randomize
