elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
If I had a nickel for every time my parents threatened to stop paying tuition I would be a very rich man. Rich enough to pay my own tuition.
Definitely got drunk and sent her a literal picture of my asshole. I titled it " you"
Vaginas are confusing as hell with all their secret compartments and shit.
I'll get my vaginal cartography poster.
it's kind of slutty but what the hell, so are we
No fireworks. Throwing the old microwave off the deck.
Tell them you aren't trying to make money, you are just the mr rogers of weed,its such a good feeling a very good feeling the feeling you know that were friends
getting busted for public urination is like, a step above j-walking. you'll be fine
ted dressed as a cardinal led an expedition across campus. i felt like one of the 12 apostles.
I learned a very valuable lesson tonight...don't touch a cops tazer
Come to this bar
But I'm full of food.
MAKE ME FULL OF YOUR DICK
You literally chaperoned my booty call.
I'm gonna try and get through this weekend sober, which is gonna be tough especially since I've already started drinking.
He showed up at my house with roses and a bottle of vodka... to watch a movie. obvi i took the vodka and didn't sleep with him
I realized today that the only things I'm guaranteed to have with me at all times are lipgloss, condoms and a USB drive. hmmm...
Randomize
