we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.
i mistaked the back of her knee for her vagina
I kind of feel like guidos are mythical creatures.
i can't believe i brushed your teeth last night. so drunk.
This morning I proved to myself and all the kids on the playground that I can't puke and drive.
I just found puke in my bra..
I could end up kidnapped. Or worse, the night will be really awkward.
Well, at least he doesn't refer to you as his associate. his mattress associate
Drunk me was responsible for doing it, but sober me was definitely cheering him on
You are right. The scrape marks on her ass are from her breaking the doggy door by crawling through it.
Ive seen his manscaping faults. Given the choice I'd rather dry hump a cactus
This is going to be one of those "I can only do this high" classes
I honestly didn't think living in Canada would change me, until I found myself watching hockey porn
His eyefucking isn't even normal eyefucking; it's eye anal.
Of course I fucked her, her man stole my bike when we were kids
Randomize
