i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
I hate it when hot girls behave. It's so anticlimactic
I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
the trail of clothing leading from the bed to the door was in the exact order i needed to put them on. underwear near the bed shoes by the door.
of all the people in our graduating class, this is exactly who would get pregnant.
that's why i use the vibrator in the tanning bed. multitasking. plus then my rooms doesnt know how pathetic of a life i lead.
This from the guy I found eating salad out of a pot lid in his boxers on his porch last night.
I wish there was an emoji to express our Eskimo Brothership
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
I feel like I'm in a development meeting for a Lifetime original movie.
I love getting kicked out of places. Its like winning a little league game
I lost my bra, he lost his virginity. Seems like a fair trade off.
I just interrupted this girl giving a dude head in a parked car on the south side. Going down on your guy while you're parked in front of your house because you don't want your parents catching you is fine by me, just don't block the fire hydrant.
Yea I went out in footie pajamas and still got laid. Good night for u?
Thanks for not letting me choke to death on my vomit last night
Thank you for attempting to organize my DVDs in chronological and alphbetical order
Randomize
