Just know that as we speak i am injecting vodka into gushers
Watched a women out our tannin salon literally fight police because she was getting arrested for trying to drunkenly fight the tanning salon owner...we need to step up our day drinking this is shameful.
I assume it was your influence that had me go from DD to waking up out on the deck with one eyebrow shaved off??
No i'm not calming down the girl at white castle did not need to see the picture of my dick on your phone.
Listen to me plotting my whoredom.
Should I feel guilty that my husband is cheating on his girlfriend with me? I mean, we're not divorced yet so I still have dibs, right?
its cute though when you google his name more than one mug shot comes up from different states
I was seriously concerned she had died since she wasn't moving at all, but then I asked here where she was last night and her response was to hip thrust the air.
Yeah i'd say someone being in the room while you're doing someone makes them eligible for fb friendship
Nope, can't do it. It's a snowball effect. Today, leggings as pants. Tomorrow, female hitler. Natural progression.
I got another blow job proposal last night. Skills.
College: when you wake up drunk without pants and wearing a Cosby sweater
tried to suck my ex boyfriends dick last night at a bar... Happy homecoming from me to you
He gives me the same feeling I get when someone puts a margarita or German chocolate cake in front of me
I said I wanted pizza tattoo on my ass and the tattooist asked me what I wanted on it.
Randomize
