you haven't felt a hangover until you wake up after a night of snorting tequila.
I took it to a new level. I'm procrastinating taking my adderall. Hate finals week.
Bitches at mcdonalds acting like they never seen a girl puke in her own coat pocket before
i think i figured out where our problem might have started...when we poured more tequila on top of out margaritas to melt the ice bc they were too cold
hahaha or putting rum in the bbq sauce?
Are they engaged or just dating? Girlfriends come and go but the memory of sex at the pool last forever.
she has like 12 pairs of underwear people left at her house from the other night
I've been drinking vodka for the last 12 hours at the beach and can't see straight and have awesome hair.
LIFE IS #1 SOMETIMES
I was like a damn cattle dog, I separated all the sheep, I can wing man for anyone on this campus.
The international association of gay square dance clubs had a booth set up in the lobby of my hotel.
Is it bad I'm drunk at orientation
You've been there for 12 hours, what are you supposed to be doing
Not be drunk
She pulled me up to my feet by my hair. I thought it was you for a second. My drunken angel savior.
Dude, he wouldn't have sex with me during halftime cause we were rooting for different teams and that would be "bad juju", I had to settle for 69.
? I'm just sitting watching something borrowed alone, crying in my boxers , feel like I should probably do something
My new favorite word is dickbag. I think its relevant here. And I say that with all the love in the world.
Blueberry probiotics greatly increase to the masturbation experience. Try it dude. It’s all the rage
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