So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
Dear tim. Christina farted and it smells like kid roses.
be a good friend and just tell me i'm not pregnant
i just used burnetts to get spraypaint off the floor of my dorm lobby
Going to get tested monday. You're coming with. Bonding time, slut style.
Honestly, where the fuck is osama bin laden?
I wish we were homeless so drinking on the streets was acceptable.
They just asked a fat guy to move to the other side of the plane. Send me a pic of your tits incase we crash
I just burped jalapeños and cum. That was the most disgusting thing ever.
All three of them were helicoptering their dicks to persuade me to take my thong off
I'm smoking a bowl with matches and a candle while my mother washes dishes downstairs. I thought adulthood was supposed to be different.
I woke up this morning with 3 phone numbers, a red Chinese New Year envelope with cash in it, and a winning scratcher all stuffed in my bra. I'd say it was a pretty successful Thursday night.
After we had breakup sex it took him longer to say goodbye to my boobs than it did to me...
Odd start to the day - the FBI just showed up at my apartment.
I swear to the sweet baby jesus I didn't fill your freezer with salsa and my little pony toys, but I didn't stop them either.
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