Tell him ill love him long time
I'll assure him of it
the cure to his relationship is in or around my vagina.
I just dry heaved the smell of jagerbombs....which proceeded to make me hurl for real.
I bet a guy could be masturbating under the table now and people would just think he was clapping along.
chipotle is closed for thanksgiving... I am officially thankful for NOTHING.
I just had a flashback to last nights party, I'm pretty sure I told most of the people there that I post a masturbation schedule for an iCal download.
her bf's celebrating 10 yrs of service at kfc...it's safe to say all the good men are taken
he somehow instantly knew i was from vermont.
it probably had something to do with chasing your soco with maply syrup.
A guy just walked down the street dressed as Mickey Mouse holding a 40oz. Where the hell did you leave me?
Shit stained towel. The very symbol of how much closer we are as friends. Fall 011... beautiful disaster
I wish you could take over my body and feel what my nipple feels like right now
I got my dick out in a gay bar for just one free shot. I didn't know I could be bought so cheap
my biography would be titled "haunting truths and dick jokes: a tale of love, loss, and masturbation."
Oh I'm sorry does your girlfriend send you better pictures of things in her ass? No? Didn't think so. Remember that the next time you wanna complain how I don't make the first move enough.
oh dont worry mom i am not sick my cough is from a recent increase in recreational drug use
that will happen
Randomize
