Do you think Capital One would let me put the Tub Girl picture on my Capital One card?
Beat you to it.
HELP! I am trapped in a douchebag ad... full of Affliction and Ed Hardy. Seriously? is he gonna leave his sunglasses on the entire 10 seconds of this encounter?
I am really glad that on the inside of a card from your grandparents you have transcribed the rules for circle of death
The dentist just called my mother to confirm the appointment that I made on his answering machine at 4:33 am this morning..
You did a line of free coke with an obese Slovenian unlicensed cab driver in the toilets of the most questionable strip club in the country. New low man.
When you put it like that, I'm inclined to agree.
We stayed up until 4:20 AM. The next thing I remember was waking up at 4 PM, like my internal alarm clock knew.
You were holding up a boot and yelling boot gang
do u know what happened to the bottles last night?
apparently we hid them.... i google mapped the location into my phone
I based a lot of our friendship on the fact that I thought you were crying from feeling so sad for me when I got crabs. I'm not sure if we can ever be as close now.
If Boring and Monotone had a love child, it would be this guy.
I can't believe you cupped pat's balls to prove your fake relationship
She is still out of it but keeps saying ur name she said to tell u dinosaurs aren't real but biscuit with a z made bad choices
Someone wrote "LazerSwords" on my cock last night. My erect cock. Tequila is no one's friend.
I am afraid of asking him for his new number so I continue to text the one that's no longer in service.
i have to pee so bad and he is sleeping and idk where the bathroom or my clothes are!!!
Randomize
