What kind of poor, pathetic town do we live in where a horny teenage girl is sitting in her basement on a saturday night, unlaid?
I just realized I haven't had steady access to a woman's body since I was breastfeeding.
btw, i had a dream i drank 260-proof vodka last night. thank god that doesn't exist in real life.
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
she got kicked out of the bar for shoving german chocolate cake in the bartenders face. we were there less than a minute
Just slept with a female bodybuilder. not cute. but it was like fucking hulk hogan with a twat. Beastly.
im so disgusted with myself. funny thing was i lasted 15 seconds. she benches 325
No no don't get confused. We do chemistry homework on Thursdays. We screw on Fridays. Other than that, Words With Friends is our only communication five days a week. We are NOT dating.
me + whiskey = a bad person
driving home hungover today was like a life test..it was like the goblet of fire
All his ex-girlfriends are delicate flowers, tho. And I'm like a trash compactor.
I wouldn't worry about it. You know what they say, THICK THIGHS MAKE THE DICK RISE.
My cousin was arrested on a class b felony for selling meth out of the back door of McDonald's where he worked. Apparently it was the extra special sauce.
It was a career choice to be sure... Mistakes were made.
So is seeing the guy's penis that I'm talking to something you're into or nah?
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
Divorce can be hard, but look on the bright side. Your soon to be ex raved about your dick and I’m great with hard things ;-)
If the multiverse is real, would you screw yourself? I'd screw myself.
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