And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
I realized courtney is my jiminy cricket but instead of preventing me from telling lies she prevents me from fucking strangers
i talked to you about this last night, and you kept saying "he wants yo pusssaayyyyyy"
i just found this napkin with your number on it in my jacket pocket. it reads amy, drawing of a wine bottle and a house
Update: I only have one shoe. The other one now belongs to the gods of jello-wrestling. May it rest in peace.
As a matter of fact, I am on the treadmill with the Bottle of UV Blue as we speak.....
Grandpa got a dui while riding a horse. This is what I need to live up to.
How many tongue depressors should I need to steal from urgent care to make samurai armor?
Well the weed wore off around 10:30 and then the date dragged on until about 1 in the morning. So I've decided I really need to start smoking closer to the actual start time of a date. Then maybe they'd be more bearable.
They are taking turns pissing on the fire. This is my life.
I woke up this morning to find a stuffed animal submerged in the toilet. I'm not entirely sure if it was the cat or Kara.
I'm officially no longer allowed to make any of my own decisions regarding alcohol, men, or the combination of both. Thats up to you now. Do me proud.
Well after we were arrested you just kept chanting "Like a good neighbor state farm is there"
So far I consider it a great summer because I have had to buy Plan B a total of zero times
You know shit got weird when you watched another guy shove drugs up your wife's ass and it wasn't awkward for any of us....
Randomize
