she didnt even puke last nite, shes finally hit champion status. i think im in love
You wouldn't stop asking the hibachi cook if his knife was a hattori hanzo
i was so high last night that i actually googled "how to get un high"
if you ask that question again our friendship is over
i just compared eating a chick out to "gargling a cheeto"
i think my mom would be mad if i was pregnant. last time i was she grounded me for a week.
they said he just opened the front of his shirt and threw up alll over himself
I find it ironic that im starting my birth control on mothers day.
Wow thanks 4 throwing jello at me an yelling who invited that guy to all the guys at the bar
Yeah I mean its Vermont, not like id be the first guy to trade pharmaceutical services for beer
Nice just gets you lonely or dead. I don't like those options.
Remember when we saw my neighbor taking dick pics of himself? He's back at it!
His pillow talk sucks. It was like Mr. Roger's vagina.
It's like the first time your mom catches you masturbating. We both know what she saw. We're just not talking about it...
I feel like a drive thru vagina
What? I'll do just about anything if you give me a sticker.
Randomize
