Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
I was worried if he didn't show me his penis, he would kill himself
There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
I have to answer enough questions about you, I don't need your uterus tossed in the conversation.
Tomorrow may or may not be a problem cause i'll be wonder woman for a halloween party aka i'll be fucked up & try & jump off of shit thinking i can fly
I just had to beg some random guy to help me climb through your porch window since the door was locked. FYI...i hear you having sex in there. You could of at least taken a break to unlock the damn door. WTF!!!
I live vicariously through you. No one mistakes me for a hooker anymore. I look like a stay at home mom of three. On bad days of four.
Fuck. I have to get my shit together by lunch. Mission impossible.
Do you think Brian would let me smoke while we fuck? I'm not sure ill survive exams without a constant nicotine intake
So we came to a decision, you need to fuck your hot roommate and send us pictures. We voted, so don't hate the democracy this great country stands for
i would never take his side over yours. you coulda gotten knocked up from another dude and i'd be right there next to you blaming it on him saying some shit like "his sperm were just too sub par for you" or "shoulda had a bigger penis"
She referred to my balls as rotund and handsome
Last night he told me I was never sexier than when I was cutting pizza. Seriously. Like, he's perfect.
I love you, and I just washed my hair in my work sink with handsoap.
hey i'm sure you are probably asleep bc you suck and think sleep is necessary to live or something?
Randomize