No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
well on the bright side, he charges $60 for an eighth
so he'll probably take me somewhere nice
I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
you turned on the Care Bears movie at 5am and kept screaming "I CARE"
stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
I just had my first experience getting hit on by a guy. It was really awkward, he touched my chest and invited me to a gay bar because "women get drunk and let their guard down at gay bars"
thats actually pretty good logic
I'm the only kid serving jury duty. And I'm the only one who may walk out of here in handcuffs for a warrant. I'm enabling these people to doubt America's youth once again.
I've reached too hung over to move status will you bring me something to drink?
I moved out 2 weeks ago remember?
Can you ship it to me then?
I was sat at the table waiting with a glass of wine reading my book and the hotel staff gave me a goldfish in a bowl and said 'heres your date for the night' !
the fact that i came three times was completely negated by the fact that he high-fived himself after.
this place is dumb. no one understands my Sunday morning alcoholism here.
Remember that time I came to London for 4 hours, got hammered, cried for an hour and then left.
I knew you were on something when you said you were a puppy and you ate all the frosty Paws dog ice cream which says not for human consumption right on the side of it.
I can’t shake the image of her gigantic black unibrow. It’s like I got a blowie from Eugene Levy
Put down the Captain Crunch and get over here. It’s a dickfest!!
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