dont ever smoke after you drink again... i dont think ive ever seen...or heard of someone throwing up and farting at the same time. that is, if you were farting.
i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
you were eating the carrots out of my guinea pig's cage and saying that you needed them more than they ever would.
Apparently it costs $70 to clean vomit off the side of our apartment building.
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
If you don't come out tonight, who's going to wake us up in the morning because they're fucking in the middle of the room where everyones sleeping?
Just had such a rough shit, don't stop believin had to be played
Hahah fuuuck, bag pipers played around me while I threw up. Literally
I'm so sick
I would imagine. You did most of your drinking for brazil last night.
That and I think I got food poisoning from sharing nachos with that homeless guy..
A giant panda just asked me for a cigarette and said "man pandas gotta smoke too." There is something wrong with this place.
I have this rep as a wingman for a reason. I'm like a poon caddy. "You might want to use a 9 iron on this hole. "
Why even have a ground level apt if you're not gonna let me climb out the window? I hate walk of shaming in front of toddlers...
it's pizza time hurry your sexcapades
I got blackout last night and applied to be a banker
AMAZON SELLS SEX SWINGS!
Randomize
