I just saw a guy wearing a tuxedo shirt under his overalls. That is true iowa class right there
she told me she was pregnant in a never have i ever game
that shit musta been laced I laughed for two hours and everyone looked like penguins
My patience ran out after you started clapping at the strippers everytime they took off a piece of clothing.
Look you found him on craigslist. You should be happy that he at least HAS a normal looking dick.
handjobs have no place on a baseball diamond
I'm sorry for peeing on your door. But it was your decision to open it.
I just want you and your enormous dick to be my fucking rebound so we can move on with our lives
COME HERE WE MELTED A CORONA BOTTLE WITH FIREWORKS
You're the reason why I want to be a better drunk
Did I put a bunch of spaghetti on you and then eat it off?!?
That you did
Also, do you have any insight as to WHY I have a note saved from the 17th of June that reads *clears throat*, "you got that swanky blues libido"
I am so stoned. And there are so many white people in this Jack in the Box.
All I want to do is lay in my bed and eat hotdogs
I just remembered I casually gave you a tour of the house after we boned...lol
Randomize
