The men handing out bibles on the quad are blatantly skipping me... am i that obvious
so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
Theres just something about looking at pictures of your dick in church that doesn't feel right
Tuesday night just isn't my ideal coke binge night.
i have to go- we're throwing the dummy from the balcony again
Is it bad that I see a party full of girls I know he has fucked as a challenge for me to be the one who ends up in his bed?
I gave her at least chlamydia. Maybe worse. She is also into chicks and loves taking naked pics. It's like the less I believe in Jesus, the more he rewards me.
My aunt left me alone with the instructions to "get waisted" by the time she returns. I love drunk aunt.
You asked me what the point was. Told me your were dying alone and then had me take you and Wendy's where you bought 3 meals and ate them in about 10 minutes saying you didn't care if you got fat...
I lost a shoe at the club last night, I think that's when I decided to go home.
Well there's only 4 people in my class, we've watched a video, the instructors encouraged us to start using cocaine and now we are on break.
It's been productive.
Do him. As soon as possible and as often as possible. That's what Oprah would say
It's almost sad. It's like the Harambe of vagina stories really.
You know you suck at relationships when you are sitting in the airport on Christmas day, alone, swiping on Tinder.
He's a wizard, there is no other explanation for how hard I came last night. None.
Randomize