i kept telling her phones are not food, and she countinued to put it in her mouth..
How many 'remember name' entries is it inappropriate to have in one's cell phone?
all she had left on were here heels. phone five
he asked you how you felt and you yelled "I FEEL SO PROACTIVE!" and started coloring with sharpies
I was too sleepy and drunk to verbally annihilate anyone and ruin their reason for being. So i just opted to sleep with the fitted sheet on the floor
definitely just forgot to put car in park in front of a police officer and ran into a bush.
I ripped my favorite jeans crossing that fence
That sucks
It's an upgrade! I didn;t even have to unzip my pants to pee!
Can we pretty pretty please go to Mardi Gras tomorrow? I promise I'll be a good girl and not puke in a pledges car
i feel like i am made of mashed potatoes. i love cannabis pills so. fucking. much.
and Katie got too high with the tow truck driver and wants to go home
Kelly and I just had sex, and you didn't call or text to interrupt, are you alive? We are both concerned.
Dude if I had a dollar for everytime she asked me to do weird shit with her when we were fucking I'd have like 4$
I'll give you some leg action but I'm not showing you anything else until your penis admits it loves me
She was shaving her legs in the neighbors pool when we found her.
Where'd she get the razor?
Not the point.
She climbed in my window blew me and left. She's in my phone as the blow job fairy
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