Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
k, so I just picked a four leaf clover, then saw my dads penis. Lucky? I think not.
ppl dont tell me stories about anal. apparently im not a tell-me-stories-about-anal kind of person
Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
I just finished washing your number off of my chest. I'm Bryan by the way.
oh my god, there is an imprint from the nuva ring in the christmas card my mom sent me. merry christmas.
The plan is to make enough mistakes this weekend to hold me over until spring break
hold on, were in the kitchen painting a yellow brick road to my vagina on my leg with black light paint.
You don't understand, we were on a waffle house. Both of us were absolutely certain we passed out at his place then BAM! Waffle house.
I'm attracted to him because he looks like the kind of guy who would lick my asshole without me having to ask.
Yes sir I did. I'll be there with a guest. And no, my date won't be an escort.
Well if that changes tell the escort to bring cocaine.
i mean i'm drinking free wine with lesbians and listening to sinead oconnor so i'm not sure who won that breakup
the bouncer just handed me a Starbucks bag of pound cake
Your participation in the democratic process makes me horny AF
You should not be involved with someone who smells like that. Because that smell seriously does not go away. Even if you can't actually smell it at any given point, it will still haunt you
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