Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
life lesson #1: a fart during an awkward silence between 2 strangers doesnt make it less awkward.
You know you are bi when you flip between the NFL Network and LOGO.
Walking home still drunk in snow. Snowflakes are my only hydration..Need moreee
Sandwiches are there for you when porn isn't.
It got a little outta hand when you wanted to do body shots on the table.. at Dennys.. at 4 AM.. with lemonade
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
And our DD is passed out in the bathtub with the curtain closed. What happened tonight
I got woken up by a construction worker, turns out I was laying in a hallway, naked and wrapped in a matress pad. To answer your question no, I did not study for this test I got David Hasselhoff drunk
I text him "Dude. Tryna get fucked here. I only have half the parts. I need your help" I'm sure my mom would be super proud of the woman I have become.
I just wrote a love letter to my weed and texted it to my cousin. I can't say it any differently. It happened.
The last two times I had sex with him I forgot who it was half way through
Also. I think I just got sentimental over a nude
I just had a flashback to me puking and you telling me it was okay because my boobs still looked awesome.
Would you laugh at me if I told you I think I burned my nipples?
Randomize
