So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
I want a grilled cheese and an IV
She sucked my dick while i watched james bond. And they say marriage sucks
How dare you. Idk what you called me, and neither does google translate, but you better take it back.
I'm so hungover I literally am considering drinking from the fishtank to avoid getting out of bed.
I have cobwebs on my vagina for halloween. And bats fly out when I open my legs.
There are some sad choices of men in the ER. That one was missing teeth. Not the place to find a husband.
I legitimately had a champagne shower last night at a rave. I was also carrying around two bananas in my pockets like guns. Drunk doesn't even. Begin to explain My night.
It has gotten to a point where I just want to sit on his face. Less butterflies, more orgasms.
Hahahaha don't tempt me. Remember we're trying to avoid airport jail if possible
Everyone called me "Barf Vader".. And I lost your lightsaber.
She meowed at me. Repeatedly. Then she asked what was wrong with me because I didn't understand her.
I. Love. Skype. Sex.
I think it's just been too long since actual dick has been inside you that you only THINK you love skype sex
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