Sorry I totally forgot to text you back. When you texted me I was at work at the pharmacy and it was stupid busy. And then of course I had my 8 hour "shoot me b/c half of Loyola comes in to buy plan B" shift.
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
She's a squirter....that makes up for lots of other annoying things
just when i thought i had forgotten how badthe sex was he comes across campus solely to say hi
I think they can follow the trail of blood to my house if they have a problem with me taking a dip in their hot tub last night b4 stepping on a broken bottle
I tried to get you a girl. They want us to cook breakfast though
Lolll I'll be sleeping
I'm practically buying you a 1 way ticket to pound town.
Makes Sense, i generally dont want the same person two days in a row. Its like what i pick for supper, i like variety
Idk man, she was drunker than me and i was sitting there talking to a raccoon about it's broken leg.
We were escorted through the guys dorm by 5 kids with nerf guns and zelda shields. I felt like the president with a fucked up secret service squad.
Dude my body has gone into shock from not eating frozen pizza and chips. I've been shitting like Richard Simmons after a night out of twerking in a corn field
I watched you down those shots like a lion cub watching its mother rip apart a gazelle
Take off your clothes and see if he wants to have sex, that's a good way to find out
I just woke up in the closet wearing nothing but a Santa hat.
It's 2017. Get with the program. Also remind me never to get margaritas with you ever on Cinco de Mayo.
Oh god establish a safe word
I'm going to! Pineapple.
Randomize
