Are you drinking alone?
no, i'm watching house
That doesn't count.
wtf, then i'm always alone
I took my penis out way before I got to the bathroom and some dude kicked me out.
The chance that I have herpes may have made me find god
I thought short asians scared me, however seeing my first tall asian I'm terrified.
there's a picture of him beating off in the library with a cowboy hat. please steer clear of this one if you ever want to be respected.
My suggestion that we all just smoke some weed was greeted with a uncomfrotable silence and a 'maybe later'. These are not our people
At what point did you actually think that you could throw knives safely?
Breakfast of champions
Is that a dick crepe?
It is indeed
It's no shave November. This is our time.
So, Cheetos don't microwave great.
An orgasm and grocery shopping is the appropriate start to every Monday.
I'm just blindly tossing my dick into whatever comes my way.
I love you but this is the first Saturday I have ever spent at the police station. And where are my boxers?
I just got the high sucked out of me. Fuck.
AND ONCE AGAIN THE HENNESSEY MAKES ME A SUPER SAIYAN
Oh for fuck's sake, is that why the couch is in the pool???
Randomize