# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
You should get sea herpes
I mean sea horses
I look like a sausage in jean shorts, you should have woken up earlier and approved my outfit.
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
I get a nice feeling when i open my fridge and see it filled with thirty beers and half a leftover jimmy johns pickle.
There's a naked kid on the floor on your side of the bed. Don't freak out when you wake up. I think we need to fix the lock on the door...
please visit steve this weekend, he is getting mature and responsible and shit which scares me.
He came in 20 minutes late for his final wearing plastic bags on his feet, and a tablecloth cape. Explain.
Also I think he would slowly, painfully, die. You really can't live without a penis. You'd explode.
I gasped. Both pairs of lips did.
A black suburban rolled up and a scary suited guy got out the passenger side and opened the door for her as she got in. Then drive off. Who did I just fuck?
I wish drunk me came with subtitles
He watches the nature channel every time I am here. It's like a manipulation technique because baby zebras will get me every time.
she started chasing me through the forest like a horny serial killer
This hangover is too legit right now. I just sneezed and almost puked
Randomize