Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
Fun fact: he pulled out my nuva ring while he was fingering me.. he looked really confused at me and it a couple of times, so i just said "surprise! not only is it good for pleasure, it's also really handy for storing plastic toys." I'm thinking he's definately gonna call.
there should be a national holiday dedicated to how high i am
I just smelled my beer. It smells like coming home.
I just threw up a christmastime peep. I am literally already sick of the holidays.
There is a different car in my driveway. Have no clue how I got home.
Stealing vibrators from Walmart together was when I realized you'd be my Maid of Honor.
DO NOT GO IN OUR BATHROOM. it cannot be unseen
I was an emotional waste case that night. She made me stroke her ponytail.
KETAMINE SUNDAYS ARE SERIOUSLY FUCKING ME UP!
Shrimp lo Mein doused in green apple Smirnoff is a rare delicacy only a few get to experience..guess I should consider myself lucky
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
So, I'm a little drunk in Seattle with Glenna, but we've all agreed that it's patriotic to think about Bill Clinton from time to time during sex. 'Merica
Thank you for helping a fellow gay friend today. You are sublime and deserve free tickets to the Ellen show
At one point I believe I was despencing medical advice while wearing a sombrero and a hulk hand
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