he only lasted three minutes, so to spite him i stayed the night and slept in.
Yea well when i pee it makes steam.
My suggestion that we all just smoke some weed was greeted with a uncomfrotable silence and a 'maybe later'. These are not our people
Idk. I woke up marinating in beer on my beanbag. Idk what you mightve done.
He told me he loved me and then asked if we could have sex in the snow
I think he was trying to tie my clitoris in a knot with his tongue. So awful.
Did you get any pics? And I can only imagine how inferior you must have felt knowing that somewhere in that room was a guy whose penis was the length of your forearm.
I never thought wine and chicken nuggets would end up being a thing that I did, but here we are
If I got paid for every bad decision I've made I would be one rich bitch by now
It's 4/20 and I spent the morning in the gym and am working later tonight. I don't even have any weed. Why am I adult-ing again?
A toast to whoever set this year's daylight savings fallback to the day after halloween, granting us another hour to detox before we pretend to be functional adults. Clearly, a partier with forethought and clear priorities. Cheers!
I think that's the first time I had "ass rimming" scroll across my phone at work
this periodpocalypse needs to be over. I need head
I smoked too much. I'm sitting on my balcony and I keep getting lost. Help me
Granted, I did not plan to spend ANY hour of the last day of 2020 sober.
Randomize
