My e-date is really photogenic. Real-life not so much
Brandy, I need a picture of your boobs. Not time to explain.
he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
dude it was like an art museum there were boobs everywhere
He googled "how long will i be drunk" and just started crying
she kept peeing on everything and yelling it was now her property.
I don't know what's worse....that fact that my dog ate my vibrator or that he later puked it up on my bed
do not give him the "i just had sex cake" i repeat DO NOT give him the cake. things didn't go well
Everyone looked at me like I just fucked a gopher and was wearing it like a hat
I'be color coordinated the clothes in my closet and my underwear drawer. I'm like an advertisement for house arrest. Help.
I was woken up in my old house by the new residents ... I don't even have a Key anymore
Sorry about the picture of wills balls via snapchat last night btw
Wore a burger king crown while giving head still drunk this morning #blessed
I cant miss out on a half day of work without a booty call
He let me eat chexmix while we fucked... I think I love him.
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