its easy. just sleep with a bunch of guys until one falls in love
well when i got there she was attempting to stick the cat in her mouth.. so maybe you should go check on her
He's sitting on the floor holding his bracket and crying, literally crying... he just keeps saying "Kansas how could you?" over and over
I told him I don't date guys unless they play a musical instrument. So, he's here and he brought a kazoo.
I'm not sober enough to be having a conversation about a rap she wrote in Spanish about public safety
Yeah.. he went to Tebow in the middle of the crosswalk and got hit by a cab... The yellow ones really don't stop
I mean there is a rehab there so its gotta be a good time
my head feels like a yellow yolk spinning in a circle at the bottom of the bowl.. i may have a concussion, love auto correct
What's an appropriate outfit for wearing to hangout with a girl you've talked to once, and had a 4way with?
You may have gone on a date, but I ate chicken nuggets shaped like dinosaurs for dinner tonight. I think we both know who the real winner is here.
That's a beautiful sentiment.
And for today's main disappontment. I thought I saw a midget with fireworks get on the buss, alas it's a child with cleaning supplies
THERE ARE SO MANY HOT DADS AT WHOLE FOODS
Apparently we fucked, I kicked him out, then he came back and we did it on the coffee table and in the kitchen.
dude the water is back on, you can stop shitting under the tree . . .
I don't even remember what dignity looks like anymore. I JUST WANTED TO ROAST SOME POTATOES
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