It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
four days late. damn you, makeup sex. you win again.
I'm praying to Jesus, Allah, Buddah,and the whole gang tonight that I'm not pregnant
I hope no one judges me for becoming a facebook fan of "Adderall" at 5:49 AM...
Found my puke from September encrusted to the floor under the dresser while cleaning before move out ..... Oh Freshman year
Sometimes he has weird facial hair...Basically he has a penis... that's what he's got going for him.
I just realized that I have to choose between a future orthopedic surgeon and a dude currently in jail. My life is so fucked.
I wish I saved his nudes so I could anonymously submit them to his tumblr
Our DD will meet us there. The strippers are sending a limo to pick him up. He promised them New Years Eve massages. Said he would still drive us home.
I need to stop getting picked up at 3 am by my friends parents. This is the second time this week. I'm a grown man.
There's a cute bearded guy at this brew fest wearing a kilt and selling mead
TELL HIM ABOUT MY DOWRY!!!
I just watched some kid bang his girlfriend and I was like whatever I'll just sit here and do all your fucking drugs that's fine
The comfort of this onesie is keeping me single
I possibly am a tad bit not really but maybe slightly intoxicated.
Randomize
