Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
I have all these new brothers and sisters I'm just now finding out about
Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
im sorry for trying to flush a roll of toilet paper down with my puke. probably not great for your toilet
thank you whoever used my nalgene as a flask. pregamin in chem
I have so much boob sweat I could bathe a baby
I just want to know what horrible accidents of evolution allowed that tiny penis to exist
They shouted last call and the guy next to me and I looked each other up and down and went in unison "yup, you'll do"
I like using largw condoms because they are more comfortable but also I feel bad because it's like false advertisement
He sent me a selfie with his cat. He has found a way to my heart. And pants.
moral of my life: don't tell a guy you want to have sex with him. he'll get back together with his ex.
I'm twenty nine years old, now is not the time to start trying new drugs. I need a hedge fund...not another drug-induced hangover.
So, I found your eyebrow, someone glued it in between my eyebrows so I looked like I had a unibrow when I went to work...
She started crying because the Rugrats grew up
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