He disabled his match.com account in front of me
Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
I realize now. I should have just made out with everyone and anyone when I had the chance.
I dont know why people are racist. Both the mexicans and the irish gave us holidays where everyone drinks on a wednesday.
He looked me straight in the eye when he was fingering me last night...it was very serial killer.
Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.
Her fortune said that she will soon be free. She's taking her bra off at the table.
It wasn't a mystery that it was the pizza cooking in the oven when we stumbled out of the bedroom in a smoke filled apartment at 2am. We are dangerous drunks
You dropped a beer and it was like when wilson floated away. Complete with sobbing apologies
Shit, no womder she didn't wanna fuck me
Virgins should have to wear a badge. This burden is too heavy...
I will feed you tacos. I will touch your butt. Happy Valentine's Day ❤️
By 9 pm this evening I'll have accomplished smashing with two different guys in two different time zones in the same day.
Stay hydrated
I'm disappointed in the internet. It's two days and there's still no fanfiction based off that Manning/Beckham commercial.
You don't even like football
You can now call me Rabbi, and I can now perform weddings, funerals, and other services in all fifty states. You're welcome, world.
The cops asked Ben if he was drunk and he slurred "I'm man enough to admit that I am" with a southern draw
Randomize
