Is it normal to miss your booty call?
dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
Any day you don't mysteriously wake up in the garbage is a good day.
Just so we're clear, that's a yes to the honey, but if you get marshmallow fluff anywhere near my body we are never doing this again
Life seems so much brighter and more vibrant after you have sex with a 20 year old. It's like how Kansas was in black and white and Oz was in technicolor.
Just finished two pages in like 20-30 mins bitches SHWAMP DRUNK LIBRARY SHWAMP
What part of drinking with my mom makes you think i'd get naked
All of it
im just laying in bed, eating, getting fat, enjoying eating and getting fat, thinking about how i will probably have to get a fat boyfriend.
Going to the bathroom drunk while wearing overalls is such a struggle
just got a call from a life insurance sellsperson and apparently our xany dealer referenced us. not cool thats breaking the 4th wall
Whatever. I have his dick. Haha how many girls can say they have a dildo replica of a guy they were seeing
A German guy asked me to take a bath with him. I can't tell if he's just an eccentric European or a run of the mill creep.
Just got a handjob in the hospital
A new low.
It was just a hint of nipple. I kept it classy!
Do you even hear yourself?
Randomize
