How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
He wanted to take me out and said we could "go huntin in the woods."
my new favorite insult= "thundercunt"
I play with my boobs when I'm bored. I playwith my nipples whe I'm drunk
i either just walked in on pete wacking off to webmd or he was checking his dick for herpes
we've progressed from teabagging to lighting eachothers asses on fire. this cannot be a good path.
We should have parties more often. I ended up with 90 beers and someone cleaned my toilet.
My eyes got the double whammy. Once with pepperspray from the riot the other with cum. Both of which i did nothing to deserve.
i mean, we fucked on the futon in the garage where his band practices. pretty sure im now obligated to like his band on facebook.
then she stuck her tongue in my ass
I thought we were talking about reason you aren't going to marry her?
from the looks of the bare footprints in the snow it looks like i was dancing in circles which explains the frozen puke
My mouth holds just enough water for my bong
What happened lastnight it looks like I had sex with edward scissor hands....my back is so messed up
my bad i broke a mirror over your back
Wanna guess where my charger was last night.....in my cooler with my beer. I put it in there because I knew I would never forget my beer.
I just woke up in a prom dress on your bathroom floor, yea I'm 32.
Randomize
