a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
Just shot my load on a stink bug. Thought you should know.
He probably has his cowboy hat on, that's his house hat.
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
No seriously stop! I feel bad for him. It isn't even big enough to make fun of. It's so small that it's like a disability.
I woke up and the only 2 bowls I own were shattered on my floor. Pretty sure my hand and tailbone are broken and I have no idea what the fuck happened
in the future when you find clothing in your street, just assume it's mine.
Lol what? Monday night impromptu acid drop was the alternative.
I just remembered you throwing bread at me and getting me to drink water out of a heineken bottle. You are my best friend.
He sent me a picture of a gas station condom and said "we probably shouldn't use this but if I was to impregnate someone on accident I'd want it to be you"
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
His mom showed up at my doorstep, begging me to take him back for him
Where do you find these people?
Why the fuck is there raw bacon in my bra. I don't even have a stove.
I didn't think you wanted your identity stolen along with your dignity. My mistake.
So turns out my new assistant isn't really my assistant. The owner needed a title for his FWB so his wife wouldn't catch on. I got a three hundred a month credit limit boost on my corporate credit card instead.
Randomize