I guess so. I don't really give a fuck. I think I'm going to jerk off really loudly tonight just to keep them on their toes
Take one last look at my face, because I'm drinking it off tonight.
Hypothetical question: If I threw up in the dishwasher do I clean it up or just turn it on? :(
I don't appreciate the fact that you tagged me as a giant bucket Miracle Whip.
Its 11am, im in the city in a pocahontas outfit, lost a heel and found a gold rolex in my lingerie.
i feel like pizza bites are my only friend right now
Just saw a homeless man taking a shower in someone's sprinkler system....
That's fun. I just masturbated and I swear my vagina creaked.
dude, apparently i tried to force feed my grandma bananas last night.
Casually brushing the Bacardi out of my hair. It's a good time to ponder regretting everything that happened last night.
YOU NEED TO STOP BLOWING DUDES ON MY COUCH AT MY PARTIES
YOU NEED TO STOP PROVIDING TEQUILA AT YOUR PARTIES
so he had an ashton kutcher Kelso haircurt. dude, we're in our mid to late 20s, I don't think we can ridicule guys for having hair anymore.
You know what's even more awkward then buying plan b from someone who is a member at the gym you work at... When they come in after that day and have that look of recognition
I always felt my time would come in the form of a tidal wave of whisky
DO NOT PREHEAT THE OVEN THIS MORNING! WE STARTED USING IT AS A WINE STASH AROUND MIDNIGHT.
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