It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
HOW IN THE HELL DID YOU BLOW A .24?????
We were watching I'm a celebrity get me out of here and taking shots every time heidi said HALLELUJAH, and started spraying her hair with that stupid dry shampoo shit....and we only watched the last half hour.
we black-lighted her bedspread and it looked like a jackson pollock painting.
Dude..masurbate with cocoa butter lotion..its like cocoa pebbles just gave me a hand job
So does it count as really great road-head if he ran over 3 mailboxes before realizing he was off the road?
So I've been to the library twice so far. Both times were for the atm, and once I was stoned. Junior year is going great.
It was like getting a handjob from a frost giant
You screamed at oncoming traffic , "five dollars to punch this guy in taint!".
what the hell is that chicken wire thing she's holding?
An artistic expression of her stupidity.
The closest I'll come to committing is leaving sex toys at their house
So I'm at early voting and the group of ladies behind me is talking about voting no on 2 and my gummy is kicking in, thank lawd
Sexting just isn't as much fun once you learn how bad he is in bed...
Can I come over and use your shower? My roommate got drunk last night and took my bathroom door off its hinges
I had no plans to sleep with him, but he had to stay because of the snow. I always say, don't look a gift storm in the mouth.
And my butt misses you like the deserts miss the rain.
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