i was watching iron chef and got motivated, so i made dinosaur chicken nuggets
We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
official worst smell ever. a used condom that has gone through the dryer.
He told me he was a psychology major, and I responded by asking him where he hid his vagina.
Of course it's dangerous. Why else would they hire us after we failed the drug test?
you described his penis as a "portable fishing pole"
why does he always try to puke into shot glasses
The ratio of last drink to last smoke is so tricky. This could go on until the booze is gone
I don't think I even want to know why you are sending my husband pictures of your nutsack.
Look bro I'll go half per boob with you, we split her.
Great news I took pics last night
Warning: most of them are of you peeing while I take selfies
In your drunken glory you promised me, tongue, 12 naked pics, and 1,800 breakfasts.
I just found a grey hair. On my nipple. Fuck you too, Mother Nature.
He was licking my ear while recommending that I shop at IKEA. I think he's my perfect guy.
The waitress at the Denny's in usa remembered me from 2 years ago when we went at 4 in the morning plastered, wearing overalls and huge inflatable corona hats on our heads
Randomize
