what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
the pharmacist hit on me as i picked up my herpes medecine. i think we found a winner.
HOW DID U BEAT A GAY GUY IN GAY CHICKEN?
i almost burnt down an apartment complex. little busy, get back to you later
Showing up at the grocery store at 5am to have the clerk sprint to the condom cabinet waiving the keys because you told him to hurry it was an emergency
Is it bad that I see a party full of girls I know he has fucked as a challenge for me to be the one who ends up in his bed?
My liver hurts and I just woke up from my first sleep in two days
Sounds like the perfect vacation
You hid from a cop under some guy's canoe on his lawn.. It didnt work
I know everytime I get my paycheck I'm like "I should probably renew my gym membership" and then I just buy more alcohol
I was peeing in the bathroom at this house party when a guy just casually stumbles out of the shower
Official reason: I couldn't get time off. The real reason: last Xmas nearly ended in alcohol poisoning to prevent me from screaming like a velociraptor
Funny how I'm trusting a magic 8 ball I found in the kids toy section to tell me about my sex life
you can't tell me not to come to work cause roads are bad then ask me an hour later to come in and expect me to be sober
In local news "Man Stabbed With Golf Club" next person who tells me this is a safe place to live gets punched...
She was topless, yelling this is Sparta, threatening to push her dad into the sewer. I am pretty sure she won't be at school.
Randomize
