I made my friend ***** cry when I wouldn't let her call u for an orgy at 3am...I didn't think you'd be to happy being woke up
He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
be a good friend and just tell me i'm not pregnant
Give me a heads up the next time you BBM me a voicenote of you cumming so I'll make sure not to play it while in the car with my parents. Miss you too.
started to yawn and threw up hamburger helper instead. awesome night.
So can we talk about how we all three made out with the bike taxi driver in lieu of paying him. I'm not even mad, that's resourceful. You know what married girls would have had to do? They'd have had to pay.
she just stared at nothing and then looked at me and goes, "that's a weird place to put the wall"
I'm shoveling snow with a camel-pack full of beer in a blizzard. I love snow days as an adult!!!
We're Scorpios. We're like dogs rolling in whatever smells good to us.
I literally have nothing else left to cut besides my drug budget; the dark days are among us
Pretty sure my first birthday present will be a pic of an 18-year-old's cock. And I am OK with that
There's just something so liberating about drinking a beer with no pants on
He called me Kitten either just because or he figured out my old s&m life. Either way huge turn on.
Have a booty call at 3am, stopped for tacos at 2:30. It's 2:55 and I still haven't ordered but can't jump the curb to get out of line because there is a cop in front of me. What am I doing with my life?
I'll start cleaning the house tonight darlin. So you don't have to fuck your two boytoys in the driveway the next two days.
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