adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
I wish you had a penis so you could experience peeing out the window in front of a crowd of people leaving parties.
threw up in a bar last night and got laid on an air mattress. my bucket list just got a lot shorter
After I threw him out he walked down the street peeing in stride. I almost wanted to let him back in.
Trying to figure out if I'm the second dude she hooked up with yesterday. I feel like a consolation prize
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
People dont know what to do when a naked fat guy is running towards them. they panic
hand jobs are a waste of time that only lead to arm cramps. Also, where do you look...his eyes, at the penis, at the tv?
yeah the "where to look" question is super awkward
I'm just like... Utterly amazed that we're still alive at this point. Who'da thunk it....
As I was about to fuck him, he requested a moment of silence for Leonard Nimoy.
I paper cut my nipple reading mail topless
You crawled into bed with Bob and started whispering to him about produce.
sarah's view on last night: a threesome to make things less awkward. oh, well done.
Your friend was nice but you didn't have to bang her in my kitchen...just sayin.
No I didn't say it was safe, I said it was legal. I didn't say anything about it being safe. It's not my fault if you weren't listening properly.
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